Hx - On Fats, and Redeeming Myself.

Yesterday I held a human heart in my hand while my lab groupmate dissected out some of the veins on the surface  But first we had to clean dried blood out of the chambers and it was awesome!  AND I got to finish cutting the sternum with a bone saw and this time, it didn't even faze me.  Pretty much total redemption on the grossness front, I'd say.

In other news, I am currently in biochemistry class, learning about why Fats are Fun.  Or not.

Note from the future: This whole "class" thing becomes quite the debate with me.  As in, I hate class.  So I guess no real debate.  Never mind.

Hx - Anatomy lab is full of The Ick.

Things are moving along.  I had my first true gross-out moment in anatomy lab yesterday; we were cutting the front of the chest wall (read: rib cage) our so we could dissect out the heart and lungs and surrounding bits.  Watching them cut through the ribs wasn't too bad, but then the instructor started pressing down on them to make sure he'd cut all the way through and the ribs started breaking... instant full-body shudders.  It was terrible.  And then we had to suction fluid out of the cavities of the lungs... ugh.  Ugh!  I can't even tell you.  And I was shocked.  I mean, medical students aren't supposed to get grossed out by things, right?  But after talking to some of my classmates I don't feel so bad.  Turns out this is a pretty standard thing; it's just different for everyone.  One girl dry heaves every time someone pulls a blood clot out of a vein.  This one guy almost passed out when we had to skin part of the body for the first time.  But somehow I've never heard anyone acknowledge that cadaver lab is just sort of... gross.  Useful, yes, but also icky.

Other than that...  how quickly my standards change.  B's used to be expected and C's were not okay.  Now C's are great, because at least I passed, and a B is the academic equivalent of a surprise box of Milk Tray.

Test craziness starts again next Tuesday.  First up: biochemistry.

Hx - Pleased

I'm really, really glad I busted my undisciplined undergrad butt last year taking histology.  It is saving me right now.  Exam in that tomorrow.  Then a bit of breathing room!  No huge exam next week, just a small OMM practical, which is sweet.

Note from the future: Premeds, TAKE HISTOLOGY.  And biochemistry.  And any neuroanatomy or neuroscience you can get your hands on.  You will thank yourself every thirty seconds or so during the first year of school.

Hx - no title

Things are grinding along.  After my anatomy test I felt wiped.  So far I am two tests down, and both were C's and both were above the average.  Part of me feels disappointed that I'm not just naturally kicking arse at medical school, but I feel like I have a read now on how much work it takes to earn (yes, earn) a C here.  A lot (more than in college).  My goal is to get a B on the next few tests.

In other news, I never thought I say this, but here it is:

Running saved my sanity yesterday.

I know, shocking.  But when the school year started I decided I would try this stupid running thing because really, it's the least time-and-equipment-consuming form of exercise.  I've graduated, at week four, to running in 3-4 minute periods at about 4.2 miles an hour.  It's not much!  But I've been running three times a week steadily, and at this rate, running for a full half hour WILL BE MINE by the end of the semester.  And yesterday, when I got my exam back, I just felt like I was going to explode, so running helped. 

Hx - School, School, School.

To begin, I suggest you look up 'giraffe in quicksand' on Youtube.  It serves as a good summary of the first year of school.

I'm losing all sense of time, which for someone with as regimented a schedule as I have, is stressful and frustrating.  As one of my classmates said, "The days are long but the weeks are short," which is sort of right and basically means that I can't remember something that happened this morning, but feel like it's only been two days since three weeks ago.  But an eternity since summer, which was... actually, I think that was three weeks ago.  or four.  three.  four.  mmmph.  [shakes head to clear it]

I am slowly losing my home life and have lost what little social life I had.  This is stage 1 of the medical student transition.  Stage 2 is when I find myself growing a new life that is simultaneously home life and social life, and is one with medical school and the people in it.  I AM FIGHTING THIS.  Most medical students lose all ties to the outside world and then, attention-starved, turn to each other (and then - stage 3 - eventually on each other.  I never said this was healthy, just codependent).  I think the downward slide is inevitable but I'm still resisting.  For instance, I am frequently home for dinner, and so far I have ALWAYS been home before 10pm.  I have to see Matt or I'll go postal and kill everyone.  Staying in limbo like this is sort of painful, though, and it's sort of costing me friends all the time, which sometimes doesn't matter to me and sometimes makes me sad.  Whatever, I never made friends easily.  I'm just not used to having to try and unsure if I feel like making the effort.

OMM is still the coolest thing I've ever seen or heard of, though.  I can't wait to start really learning.  Yesterday was the supremely awkward Day of Major Anatomical Landmarks, where we palpated everything from the clavicles to the ankle bones to the sacrum and pubic bones.  Yes, on each other.  Yes, regardless of gender.  Yes, even more awkward things loom in our collective future.  Next semester in OMM is all pelvic and sacral work.  Awkward, but also still the coolest thing ever.